Written on Sunday, June 19, 2005 7:28 PM
Sometimes i wonder why i even bother...I feel like I'm this puny shell fish hiding under someone's shadow..
just cause hiding in the shell ain't quite enuff.
I CANT STAND IT ANYMORE.
I just realised like I have no besties at all.
I just hop around.
There are people who think i'm a bitch,
Not that I think I'm not one..
I think I m one anyway.
I feel so so lonely and cold inside...
like nothing will ever make me happy again.
I know God is here with me..
But..
Sometimes I feel that other then Him I have no frens at all...
People clique up and I'm just a hopper round.
Even in our canoeing team,
being as small as it is already,
There are also cliques....
Somehow.
Thinking of all this already leaves me in tears.
I just realised that I never go out with my classmates at all.
Ain't that pathetic?
Maybe I'm just an insociable freak..
So much so that I become transparent and they go out without even calling me at all..
Do they really hate me that much?
I know I suck.
I know that I really really do.
I dunno.
I feel so empty inside.
I must have FAITH.
I will trust in God to deliver me from this valley of shadow.
Yea....
janified 0'5